Nothing in particular brought it on. Or, at least, nothing I remember .
A normal trip to work. Not unlike any other. 30 minute drive. Modest Mouse, probably.
But i it came to me with a ferocity Id not been prepared for.
A burning. Starting in my stomach, I think. I can't be sure as it spread so fast; to my chest, and then my face. And my mind jumped suddenly to all those stories of spontaneous combustion I'd heard about in grade school. The classroom arguements as to fact of stories. And I thought, Is this what it feels like? Just before it happens?
Will these internal flames burst free? Will they engulf my hair and flesh as they have my blood? My brain?
Will they consume me? Leave me to a pile of ash on smoldering upholstery?
It never happened, in case your wondering.
It faded as I entered the greenhouse. As everything fades there. No, it's not accurate. There is much growth. But not for that. Not there,
I am a water bearer, so the stars tell me. Well, not the stars. Rather, the people who interpret them.
The stars do not speak to me. They sing. In vibrating waves of photonic matter. They've never personally regailed me with tails of mermen pouring jugs of precious H2O. But perhaps my ears are not open enough.
(Is it sea water, I wonder, or fresh? Ive not heard anything either way.)
Water bound as I'm said to be, it is fire that entices me. That erratic flicker of searing heat preaches to me.
"You can never be completely lost. You are in here, somewhere. At least partly.
Watch, wait, listen , be still.", it orders me. Its voice calming, commanding.
"In my glow you can find your center".
And I can.
Whether above or below, always slightly to the left.
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